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The Tapestry Quote Book

We have many "favorite things" that we love here at Lampstand Press. We love God, and each other, and serving you! We love our work, and our products. We love learning about history, literature, geography, and all the rest of our Tapestry subjects, all over again, as we do the Redesign project. We love (and hate!) wrestling with things like grammar, punctuation, formats, citations, and graphics. (Have you ever tried to keep capitalization rules consistent through 8,000 pages of curriculum? It's quite a job!) And we love to quote books, music, and movies as we work together.

One of our "mostest favoritest" (isn't that gorgeously appalling grammar?) things is the Office Quote Book. Christy has been its keeper for three years; she has collected most of the accidentally-funny or on-purpose funny things that our workers have said over the course of each year of writing and editing the Redesign Project.

We jokingly refer to these as "seasons" of our "show," which we call "The Office." After three years of enjoying these quotes in private, we thought we'd share a few of them with you, to give you a window into our lives. Hopefully we will post a sprinkling of these every so often, so that you can chuckle along with us! There is only one thing that you have to remember: these quotes are taken wildly out of context. And that's what makes them funny. ;-)

A Smattering of Quotes from Year 1 of the Redesign Project:

Cast of Characters: Marcia of course (here called "Mom" since Christy is the recorder), as well as Nate (Vice President of Production), David (Creative Director), Christy (Staff Author), Casey (Staff Editor), Laura (Chief Editor), Grace (Nate's Assitant and Bookstore Manager), and Abbi (one of our production workers). This is back when Production and Development workers were all crammed into the same warehouse space. A word about Office relationships: Marcia is Mom to Nate, David, and Christy (who are, obviously, siblings). David also likes Casey (they have since gotten married), and Laura is one of Marcia's former students.

"I don't understand people." - Christy, out of the blue.
"Let me explain them to you. The first thing you need to know is that there are boys and girls. They may seem the same, but they are really quite different. You okay with that so far?" - David
"Uh-huh..." - Christy
"Okay. There's a lot of secondary stuff, but basically guys want food and girls want...um... flowers....." - David

"You want to know how much more surreal your life could be, Christy?" - Laura
"Sure!" - Christy
"Choc and Pik play a powerful game of Pok-a-tok." - Laura, reading aloud from her Tapestry week-plan editing.
::Pause::
"But you can't guess from the names which one is a minor deity and which is a human boy." - Laura

"That was work-related! My work-related comments are just funnier than yours!" - David in response to Christy's rebuke for joking while working.

"I will now whisper the national anthem in haiku to myself. That should help." - David, to no one in particular.

"Aren't you proud of me? How often can I edit myself?" - Mom to David, who is always trying to get Mom to be more succinct.

Some of our funniest moments come when Mom and David are "doing graphics" together...
"No, we don't want an arrow." - Mom
"Mother, please. I wasn't thinking anything about an arrow... I was thinking..." - David
"More like a curlicue..." - Mom
"...yeah, or a dotted line..." - David

Then there are those flashes of insight...
"It's funny. Most of the death dates for famous people are certain, but a lot of the birth dates aren't. When they were born, nobody knew that they were going to be important." - Laura, doing people glossaries
"There's a lesson for life in there somewhere." ::pause:: "I don't want to know where." - Christy

David, after Christy has asked him to shush so that she can concentrate:
"I was singing beautifully. That was a gift to the world, the way I just sang!" - David

"You see, Jacob tried this and it worked. But I am not yet blind, and you are not all dressed like goats. It ain't gonna work!" - David on why he can't be tricked into giving out blessings.

"Neo-Babylonians?!?! Since when do we have Neo-Babylonians???" - Christy

"I love eyebrows. They're so useful and quirky. You can say anything with eyebrows." - Christy, wiggling hers for emphasis.

"The chart! Where is the chart?" - Christy, thinking that her file has lost data.
"I ate it." - David
"Oh really?" - Christy
"Yes. It tasted like a lemon cough drop." - David

"Christy, apparently there is a fourth requirement for a civilization. It should be: food, safety, strong central government, and Starbucks." - Laura to Christy, after listening to David
"It's true! Someone should tell Mom. She needs to rewrite the curriculum." - David
"Oookay." - Christy, thinking that it is very obviously 4:30 pm on a work day.

When they start to talk about fonts... duck!
"Casey, I have one word for you! Papyrus!" - David
"Ewwww! That is so overused! But I have something for you. Comic Sans!" - Casey
"Oh, yikes! ... yeah!" - David
"When you two geeks get done gerbilling at each other..." - Nate, who is wandering through.

"Don't die. If you die, I'll be bored." - David to Christy

And then, there are our moments of triumph:
"Mommy?" - David
"Yes?" - Mom
"We have here what strongly resembles a week-plan." - David

"So you're walking around with a wicker footstool on your head..." - Christy
"I am thinking. This is my thinking cap at the moment." - David

"You can't tell me that we should sit here with an unadorned front yard, when the Sumerians have a ziggurat!" - David

"I can't spell 'silhouette.' I'm a failure." - Christy
"Christy, some people are born failures, some people achieve failure, and some have failure thrust upon them. Which would you say you are?" - David

"What is this!?" - Christy
"It's a Word document, Christy. Be afraid. Be very afraid." - Laura, president of the "I Hate Microsoft Word club at Lampstand Press.

"You know you're royalty when you can get away with wearing something completely silly." - Davy, doing a graphic rendering of the Pharaoh's crown.

"That's what he is! Hermes is a GI Joe with chicken legs stuck up on his head! If you can't deal with that, stop studying mythology!" - David to Christy, who has given her candid opinion of one of his illustrations.

"My feet are not a beacon for all mankind, okay? - Christy
"Not for all mankind; just for David." - Laura
"Your feet are my beacon." - David, looking adoringly at Christy

"Cease fussing and know that I am Mom." - Mama, when the din gets too loud to concentrate any more.

"I have cute dreams." - Mom, when we're all laughing at her latest retelling.

"I come, O David, I come... where do I go?" - Mom to David who has asked for her approval on his latest graphical creation.

"Is there joy in Mudville?" - David
"There is." - Mom
"Yes!" - David

"Oh, wow. I just wrote, 'People of the ancient Americas, without the use of mental tools, erected magnificent temples of dressed stone.' That needs to be metal, not mental!" - Christy

"Go back to your computer! And stop being so unspeakably cute!" - Christy to David

"I need my gods, and I can't find them anywhere!" - Christy, searching for the Egyptian gods and goddesses page in Ancient World.
::Pause while Mom and David give Christy a bemused look::
"Yeah, Laban had that problem too." - David

"You know, it's just so convenient that everybody has a goddess for a mother or a river nymph for a sister." - Christy, mostly to herself, flipping through the Aeneid
"I know I do! Don't you?" - Casey

Birthday Mommy!

Greetings!

Christy Somerville (CJ) here! I respectfully but unashamedly beg to interrupt your regularly scheduled blog in order to honor my mother on her 50th birthday. At noon on a Tuesday exactly fifty years ago, Marcia Somerville came into the world. She has been blessing people ever since.

There are so many things that I might tell you about my mother. I could relate the course of her various brief careers as a ski instructor, a radio DJ, a drama major and later a director of Greek plays, a European tour guide, and a bona fide artist of clay and pottery (really!--We still have the wheel and kiln.).

I could also tell you about her love for trying new things, including her latest favorite: saltwater aquariums. I will show you pictures of the last one, because it's pretty impressive for a 49-year-old who is a self-professed math and science dunce to take up all the finicky salt-and-light-and-algae-and-water-and-chemicals management of her own 3 X 6 foot saltwater reef tank! She loves to do this with Dad (who is the math/science whiz and engineer extraordinaire of the project), and she has even learned to solder tank partitions and build complicated-looking compartments in their "Engine Room." See?









But look at the results; haven't they done a beautiful job?




The fish tank is just the latest wrinkle. Over the years I have watched Mom tackle jobs as various as building and decorating her dream house, learning to garden, maintaining, strengthening, and beautifying her marriage, and simultaneously acting as teacher, boss, best friend, counselor, nurse, and best of all, Mom, to her growing and grown-up children.

A few nights ago we all gathered to celebrate Mommy's birthday. As is traditional in our home, we went around the table and honored her for the various evidences of God's grace that we have seen in the past year. My older brothers pointed out her faithfulness and perseverance, which they now especially appreciate as head-of-households. My younger brother and I, who get to work with her every day, talked about how much we enjoy the humor of the office and love it that she is our boss. My little sisters, aged 20 and 17, talked about how they have grown to appreciate her as a friend and confidante as they step into college and womanhood. Daddy said how amazing it was to him that he knows her so well and yet she still surprises and delights him every time he turns around.

All these are wonderful things. But I want to say again here one of the things that I said to her that night, which I think we kids and Dad would all agree is the most important thing. This is the substance of it,

"Mommy," I said, looking down the long, heavy-laden family table to where she sat beside Dad, "I love you for so many reasons. I love having you for a friend. I love your sense of humor. I love the way you try new things, especially since I'm afraid of them! But most, most of all, I love it that you have made the Gospel real to me. You know I'm not a very trusting person, and if I could see that the Gospel didn't really make a difference in your life and Daddy's, I wouldn't have accepted it. And if I hadn't accepted it, I wouldn't have this sense of peace, of knowing who I am and what I'm about, of being happy and content, that I see lacking in the lives of so many singles around me. I wouldn't have hung my life on the Good News. Your example hasn't been perfect, but it has been genuine. You've shown that the Gospel works. You've made it real, and beautiful. I'm going to live the rest of my life by the Gospel, and in a big way, that's because of your day-in and day-out example. I love you for that."

So Mommy, just to reiterate... it's not the clothes you wear; it's not the way you do your hair. It's not because you're adorably cute, and it's not because you have such fun hobbies. It's not because you try new things, or because you're well-educated and gifted. It's not because you're perfectly competent, or perfectly patient, or perfectly trusting in God (you would be the first to say that you aren't any of those things!). It's not because you're the best boss ever and the "most funnest" person in the world with whom I could be writing a curriculum. It isn't even because you love other moms like all get out. In short, it's not because you are some sort of perfect SuperWonderfulFrabjousGodly Homeschooling Mom (none of us are that!). It's because you love God, and your life shows that loving God is better than anything else.

You once taught me never to underestimate the power of an example, whether good or bad. Mommy, I don't think I could underestimate the power of your example. How kind, how unspeakably kind of God, to save you out of your sin and make you into what you are today! The Gospel is effective. It's effect on you dazzles me every day of my life, and makes me more in love with God than ever.

Job Description

Today, I get to read a short biography by one of my favorite authors (John Piper) about one of my historical heroes (William Wilberforce). Then, I get to write questions for high schoolers that will help them see more clearly the depths of the wisdom and glory of God as expressed in the life of Wilberforce (who worked with amazing perseverence to change laws in England so that slaves were first no longer imported and then no longer held at all in England). This man's life was inspirational for his fortitude, but what is even more inspiring is the God Who gave him the heart and soul to effect such great things for humanity. I get to highlight this to high schoolers around the country and even around the world and their moms, as I write that discussion outline as well. Wow. What a job!

But, know what? I haven't seen it this way every day. For many days in recent past, I have not been wondering at the fact that I get to do this, but complaining that I've got to do this. "I've got to go write Week 6," I sigh. "I've got to work late tonight." "I've got to read this or that book for my curriculum writing." Then the "I'd rather be's..." being and flow like water from my mouth. My complaints and self-focused sighs have been voiced for so many days that I can't begin to count them. It pains me to think of how often I've grumbled and complained about my job, which is a gift from Father's hand, perfectly crafted for me, and a privilege to perform by almost any standards. One little letter is all it takes to change me from "get to" to "got to." But in that little change is a world of sin. God takes a potently negative view of those who grumble about His revealed choices for their lives and vocations. Here's a sample:

Numbers 14:28-35 (ESV)
Say to them, 'As I live, declares the Lord, what you have said in my hearing I will do to you: [29] your dead bodies shall fall in this wilderness, and of all your number, listed in the census from twenty years old and upward, who have grumbled against me, [30] not one shall come into the land where I swore that I would make you dwell, except Caleb the son of Jephunneh and Joshua the son of Nun. [31] But your little ones, who you said would become a prey, I will bring in, and they shall know the land that you have rejected. [32] But as for you, your dead bodies shall fall in this wilderness. [33] And your children shall be shepherds in the wilderness forty years and shall suffer for your faithlessness, until the last of your dead bodies lies in the wilderness. [34] According to the number of the days in which you spied out the land, forty days, a year for each day, you shall bear your iniquity forty years, and you shall know my displeasure.' [35] I, the Lord, have spoken. Surely this will I do to all this wicked congregation who are gathered together against me: in this wilderness they shall come to a full end, and there they shall die."( English Standard Version)

Grumbling isn't confined to me. It's a constant temptation to us homeschooling moms because we can so easily get our eyes off the eternal nature of our jobs and onto the many tasks that can go unnoticed and unthanked. Our pay day is so far in the future that we can feel that we're wandering in the desert, and doomed to die there, instead of purposefully and joyfully heading for a Promised Land. We fall into grumbling and complaining about our jobs as homeschooling moms because we lose perspective (and because we're sinful). Do you think my job sounds meaningful? Let's think together about yours.

You get to wake up each morning and greet your Lord and Savior, Who will give you all that you need for godliness and joy in living if you but tarry with Him awhile. You get to teach one or more young children each day to become future blessings to mankind each day. You get to be the primary shaping influence in their lives. Most of us get to stay and work in our own homes, surrounded by the decor and conveniences that we have chosed, and secure from terror or danger, while our husbands go out and work to provide food, clothing, and all the things we need for us. We get to introduce our children to Jesus. We get to have a front row seat at a thousand acts of kindness and love that our dear Savior pours out on us and through us on the people we love every day. We get to minister to our tired husbands, our sick children, and our ailing parents and our troubled friends and neighbors. It is our privilege to be ambassadors for Christ to a sin-sick world each day, whether or not we even leave our homes.

And when we are done in this world, we will get to hear "Well done, good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of your Master." Well, that's a great job; one we can thank God for in every season of our lives. Let's do all we can to retain perspective on the job we have and the life we've been given. There's so much to be grateful for!

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Spiritual Reformation

Isn't it great that we never need to stop learning about God? I find, though, that I need to be purposeful about dragging my mind back and back and back again to focus on God, Himself. It's so easy to get caught up in doing things FOR God... or for my family for God, or for the church for God, etc. Pretty soon, I'm about five steps from God, Who becomes the reason--somewhere--I guess--way down deep, but not my conscious reason for living. It's not enough to busy myself with the things of this world. I need to be conscious about God more and more in the moments of my day!

Turning 50 really is turning a corner. Suddenly, I realize that I'm probably a whole lot closer to Heaven than I am to earth. I'll be spending an eternity with God, so how much time am I investing now so that I'll enjoy Him to the fullest? I don't want my life to be so taken up with tasks for God that I forget to spend time with God or contemplating and enjoying God himself.

So, my recent Bible readings have been focused on Phillippians. In chapter 1, there's a beautiful prayer by Paul that I decided to dwell upon. And, while doing so, I dug out A Call to Spiritual Reformation: Priorities from Paul and His Prayers by D. A. Carson, who investigates the Epistles to see what lessons Paul taught in his "school of prayer." I also made a new playlist, which I entitled "Joy." I combed my iTunes list (and even downloaded a few new songs) to put together songs that were rejoicing in either God or the life He has provided for us here, so that while I worked on Week 6 of Year 3 today, I might rejoice in the God Who loved me enough to give His life for me. It is He Who is waiting for me in Heaven... not that far from now. I am finding myself refreshed today as I take time to remember Jesus more through the day through these simple, but purposeful, disciplines.

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Hayacinths to feed my soul
















If of thy mortal good thou art bereft
And of thy slender store two loaves alone to thee are left,
Sell one, and with the dole
Buy hyacinths to feed thy soul.
--Saadi

When I lived in New England and March 1 rolled around, I was still looking at two more solid months of cold weather before all the snow was gone, and three more solid months of school with very few breaks. Scott would buy me hyacinths. Oh, the color! Oh, the smell! I placed them on my kitchen table, and whenever I sat to do one more math lesson, or stood to fold one more load of laundry, I would bend over and take a huge whiff of spring. The smell was promise. It was hope. It was love. It was all those and more... it whispered of the miracle of God's creative abilities and His never-failing grace.

Yesterday, even though I'm no longer schooling and I live now in MD, where daffodils will be up before March is spent, Scott bought me hyacinths for our date night. Oh, the color! Oh, the smell! They take me back. They remind me of all those years where God gave me grace to persevere through another school year to "finish up strong," as my dad always said. And, yes, they are giving me the renewed hope, faith, and love to soldier on with this spring's tasks and challenges.

Do you need a boost? Take Saadi's advice! I guarantee it'll help.

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Time and Organization

Time. We all have the same amount, and there never seems to be enough. Why is that?

I'll be 50 in early April. (Scary thought... gives rise to all kinds of musings about what I've learned/accomplished in 50 years... but that's for another post...) When I was younger, I thought that I didn't have time enough because of the demands of my young family. Then I got busier, so I thought that it was the demands of homeschooling and parenting. It seemed that time was short and tasks were many. But, those days are done. Suddenly, it's not parenting that I fill my days with, and not homeschooling, either. From this vantagepoint, I am more aware of (and grateful for) the insight that my friend, Yvonne, shared recently that while we didn't have much leisure time in those intense years, the pressing needs of family and homeschooling were wonderful guardrails on the road of life. In entering this latter phase of my life (when the children are launched, and all I have to fill my days is the work of writing and helping to run a small company) I find myself far more tempted to selfishness and sin than I ever did in earlier years. Somehow, bearing children, caring for my home, and teaching my own children seemed more directly "of the Lord." To me, they were very clearly my role as a woman, wife, and mother. Writing and running a small company seem different. They seem... optional. I am much more tempted in this phase of my life, as the children are grown and there seems to be more room for choice in my life, to choose what pleases me and grumble if things don't go my way. Who would have thought that the busy, early years were God's kindness? He led me in paths of righteousness for His Name's sake by hemming me in behind and before!

Lately, in realizing the new temptations of a new season, by God's grace I've been reading some good books that are helping me put down complaining and self-centered resentments and gladly enter into active, purposeful living so that I can, in this season of my life, do the things that God is leading me to do. I've found two tools most helpful:

1. Shopping for Time: How to do it All and NOT be Overwhelmed, by Carolyn Mahaney and her daughters, Nicole, Janelle, and Kristin is a small, approachable Godsend. It neatly lays out very practical steps by which a godly woman can live purposefully.

2. I've taken up my planner again. I had gotten away from keeping any kind of planning system, and so was living day to day without making lists that would enable me to fit in the things that were important, but not urgent. In my younger years, I learned this lesson: plan your work and then work your plan, but as the urgency went out of my days, and the choices multiplied, I found that it was easier to complain about how busy I was and make excuses than to plan in the things I really wanted to do for long-term goals. These are things like staying in touch with extended family, sending birthday cards, writing notes of encouragement, and (most dreaded) regular exercise. By God's grace, and with the help of my trusty planner, I am now finding it easier to do things that I've been wishing to do for months and years! Praise be to God!


These two small steps that are making a big difference as I seek to find my feet in the new season to which my Savior has led me. I'm wondering how many of us--no matter which busy season of our lives we find ourselves in--find it easier to complain and repine than to take up the challenge of living purposefully and selflessly, to the glory of God?

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Rejoice with us!

Many of you enjoyed seeing pictures of Son Mike's wedding to Jessica Loftness in 2006. (Review here: http://weddingpixel.com/slideshows/michaeljessica/ )

Nora Caryl Somerville was born today! She weighed 8 lbs. and 5 oz. and is 20 inches long.


Mother and baby are doing WELL!


My husband, Scott, and my mom, Nancy, greet Nora:



The delighted parents!

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